Light

“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16

In my last post, I referred to the fact that there is power in praying scripture over your life. If you do not currently do this, I strongly encourage it, but I also know it takes a while to get used to this concept, if it’s not something you’ve pursued yet. As I, have only started praying scripture in the last 3 years, and really doubled-down in the last year. Let me share the story of how I have figured out how incredibly powerful this can be.

When I first started going to church again – 6 years ago, I was right back to my old ways. I’m here, I’m singing, I’m sitting in the pew, but I’m still totally doing my own thing when I’m not in this building. And, I can’t say that I was really expecting a lot, I felt like I was going to church for my kid, but also because God had put me here and I grew up hearing the stories of Jonah and Sarah, and was not about to blatently defy God. I believe this went on for about a year. We’re going, my son is loving it, and I’m enjoying the church-folk but like I said, not really seeing where this is going. And, then, one day, something motivated me to stop making excuses and start really studying the Bible. I want to say it was that my son kept asking me all the questions about the Bible, I realized that I really couldn’t answer a lot of his questions – but to be honest, I cannot really recall right now. Ok, so now, I’m a mother of a 4 year old, I have a full-time job, I just recently finished online school, and my career is starting to take-off, and when do I have time to study the Bible? Besides the fact that I’m still doing a lot of this under the radar because my husband is not a believer, and periodically likes to bombard me with questions about my faith, that I do not have the answer to. I reach out to my dad, who is forever excited about buying someone any biblical materials they might ever need. I find a book, that claims to have 5 minute devotionals for your ultimate busy mom. Perfect. My dad buys it, and I start reading it. Slowly at first, not every day, but I’m here, I’m trying. And, as I continue to force this habit, it becomes easier and easier. I started waking up 10 minutes earlier every day to give myself plenty of time for a 5 minute devo. I think it was only supposed to take me a year, but it took like a year and half, maybe a little longer. But, low and behold, when I got done doing that one, now I wanted to read another one. This is now something I continue to try to do. You seriously just have to find something, some way, to get you started. Now, because I’ve read devos, I’ve realized there are certain books of the Bible I want to read, so those have become my morning devos. I have also started waking up even earlier to give myself plenty of time to pray. Also, another habit that I had to originally force, but now, I’m doing it a lot. Sometimes, I have to be careful, I’ve gotten so caught up in prayer I’m almost late for work. It’s wonderful. Deep down in your soul wonderful. It’s such an intimate, holy, wonderful connection. I will probably have several entries on prayer throughout this time. Once you truly figure it out, it is incredibly rewarding and you will realize why there are books dedicated to prayer. Anyway, back to this story. So, about 3 years ago (2 years of devotionals, and about 1 year of trying to figure out how to pray) I realized that I wasn’t praying for myself really. I was praying for my mom, and my son, and my dad, and, and, and ……. what do I want? What should I pray for myself? I didn’t really want to pray for more money, or my career, or whatever, I wanted something open-ended, something that I could leave open to the interpretation of God. What do I want, that you -Almighty Father – want? I pondered on this for a long time. Read scripture. Read devotionals. Listened to sermons. What do I want? Then, one day, it came to me. Matthew 5:16. I want to be a light.

3 1/2 years ago, I started praying to be a light. Originally, it was just in my morning prayers, like right at the end, “and let me be a light, that others may see you through me.” I honestly had no idea what I was doing with that incredibly powerful scripture. Slowly, I started changing. I started wanting to go to church, like really wanting it. I started wanting to read my Bible, more, not just in the morning, I started wanting to do volunteer work to help with missions again. I started really changing. Becoming a new creature in Christ. Fast forward to this year. I walked into a new church that I had started attending a little bit last year (approximately around the same time that Satan started hitting me with blow after blow – please believe that it is not lost on me that Satan did not want me to connect with this church.) and as I’m talking to a Pastor that is just On Fire for God, he looks at me, and says, “You’re a light, sissy.” And I almost started crying. Here we are, 3 1/2 years of praying, and a Pastor just said it to me. Now, he had no idea that I’ve been praying for this, I’ve hardly met the guy but a few times at this point. That was the Holy Spirit acknowledging me. Then, a few weeks later, one of my best friends writes me a Thank You note out of the blue, saying how grateful she is that we are friends, and how she admires my relationship to God – “You are such a light for him.” Wow. She, too, also has no idea that I’ve been praying for this. I have had several people since then, make the same comment, and the entire time, I’ve been keeping this to myself because I’m just in awe of the Holy Spirit acknowledging my prayers. Then, on Christmas Day, I got the one that has inspired me to share this with all of you. When people asked me what I wanted for Christmas this year, I didn’t really have an answer, but one of the things that I did tell 1 person I wanted, was some “Jesus clothes” as in – something that referred to Jesus love you, Faith in the cool cross way that they’ve been doing it, etc. Something. I don’t really have any “Jesus clothes” and I wanted some. Well, here I had celebrated with the family and had not received any “Jesus clothes” but, oh well, it’s ok. Not a huge deal. When, one of my best friends says she has a gift for me. And, low and behold, a Jesus shirt. She’s not even the person that I told that I wanted one. And, not only is it a Jesus shirt, here is what it says, “I am the LIGHT of the world, those who follow me will never walk in darkness.” I am speechless. Amen!!! Here we are, 3 1/2 years into this prayer, and the Holy Spirit is just confirming and answering me all over the place. I’m just floored. And, look, here’s this blog, reaching out to all of you. Encouraging all of you. To be a light, to shine for him, to follow him, he will never leave you or forsake you. He will always come through. He has started a good work in you, and he will see it come to pass. So, I encourage you to decide what you are asking God for in this new year. Do you know? Maybe you’re not even that far. Maybe you just need to decide to set aside time for him and stick to it. They’re all steps on the path, but where is your path taking you? I’m choosing to Walk by Faith, not by sight this next year. 2 Corinthians 5:7 I hope you all will join me. God bless you and keep you in 2019!

3 thoughts on “Light

  1. This is a powerful word Stephanie!! I hope you can share it st Bible study sometime!! You – walking miracle – me too 🀩❣️😍

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