The Best You

These past few weeks at my new job have been interesting. And, again, I deeply appreciate my guest entry last week, as that helped lighten my load, as it started to warm up here, and it created a whole slew of things to do. But, as I sit down, to wonder what we’re going to discuss here this week, it all became clear – in an instant. Be your best you. As my verse this week states: we are fearfully and wonderfully made. God made us just as we were intended to be. Be your best you. Easier said than done. I’ve had a couple reminders these past few weeks. I’ll share with you here.

Get it together

I’m a really organized person. Like really organized. It’s a control thing, it’s an OCD thing, it’s how my brain works, and when things get too messy, I struggle to cope and to keep up. Which is a far cry from where I used to be. But, how I got here is not too much of the point. The point is, with a new job, you have to switch gears. You have to get a new kind of organized. What worked for your old job, will not necessarily work for your new. And, in my new role, I’m moving at the speed of the internet, so taking the time to figure out how to organize stuff is not really up there on everyone else’s priorities, but it was jamming me up. What I mean by that, is my new boss would ask me a question about something, and because I haven’t gotten a system together yet, it’s taking me 3x as long to get the answer, get it together, figure out where that one thing was written…. UGH!!! Not me. Not me, at all. Although, he’s been incredibly graceful and understanding, I feel like I’ve got egg on my face. So, I took extra time these past couple days to start sorting, organizing, and putting myself back together. And, I already feel a lot better. Because I know, that my best self, cannot function under a certain level of chaos. But – it took me a long time to figure that out. Before, I would just buckle under pressure. Not understanding what my issue was. Not understanding why I suddenly just couldn’t do something any more. Retrospect – it got too messy, and I had not been taking any maintenance steps to clean it up. Or any extra steps to get it under control in the first place. Although you might not need to clean or organize to function, you do have something that helps you feel like you’ve got it together, and you need to make sure that when life starts spiraling, you’re taking the extra time or making time to do what you need to do, to be the best you. Otherwise, something’s going to give… and it’ll probably be you.

Give yourself some grace

Now, because I’ve learned from past mistakes, and because this isn’t my first rodeo. I also understand that I need to give myself some grace. We are always our own worst critics. And as you saw a moment ago, my boss has been very gracious, he gets it. This job is intense. You know the job’s going to be intense, when they’re forewarning you, in the interview. Straight-up. No beating around the bush. How do you handle stress? And, we strive to only work 45 hour weeks… Absolutely transparent about what I’m signing up for. And, although, it’s only my second week, I knew that I needed to figure something out quickly, even if it would go through major re-vamping later. And, my boss has told me, almost every single day, “Good job.” “You did well today”. Something. So, I know that I’m putting my best foot forward, and he is acknowledging that. It’s ok that I’m struggling for stuff here and there, I’m trying to catch 50 balls in the air, it’s no easy task. In the first few weeks, some stuff is going to hit the ground, and that’s ok. I think, everyone would be surprised if some stuff didn’t fall. I still feel really great about my job. I like my boss. I do not regret my decisions. I do not feel like I have to be perfect. And, I’m totally honest when I catch a mistake. And, everyone would much rather be told that a mistake happened and proactively do something about it, than catch it two weeks from now when it hit the fan. Learning moment. *By the way, that’s just something to live by. Own your mistakes, asking for grace in advance is much healthier than asking for it afterwards. And, it slips out of people’s memories a lot faster than when it all went catastrophically wrong and you spent twice as much time cleaning up the mess. Ain’t nobody got time for that 😉 Give yourself grace like God gives you grace. Every day, all the time. It’s hard being a human. Cut yourself some slack.

Know your worth

Here’s my favorite story of the week. My son was playing a new computer game the other night, and unbeknownst to us, it had a chat feed at the bottom of the screen. So, here’s my son, playing a brand new game that he’s been all excited about, and he’s struggling, and the trolls show up…. And, you know, they all start saying all this horrible garbage, because that’s what trolls do. Next thing we know, we tell him his time is up, and as he angrily closes out the screens, he turns around, and he’s got tears streaming down his face. And, I’m thinking, he’s upset because his time went by “too quickly” and he wants to keep playing. So I start saying, you know, we set a timer, timer’s done, man. He’s like, “No, it’s not that. It’s just that everyone sucks.” And I’m like, ? “What are you talking about? Who sucks?” He says, “All those awful people in the game.” Again, “What?” Then, he informs us that there was a little chat screen below the big game window (that we couldn’t really see from where we sit), and that he was having a hard time playing the game because he didn’t understand some of the stuff, and that people were making fun of him. OOOOOOHHHHHH!!!! *Mom moment* Well, honey, you can’t let those people get to you, they’re just angry little kids, they had no idea it was your first time playing. (disclaimer, my son is almost 10) The conversation continues, and morphs into a discussion where I finally looked at him and said, “I’m going to give you some real grown up advice here. You ready? You can’t ever let someone tell you what you’re worth. You have to decide that. You know, you’re an amazing little kid, you’re in Cub Scouts, you do community service, you’re learning the piano, you’re an A/B student, you’re amazing. You have a good heart. Those kids don’t know any of that stuff. Same thing goes for kids at school, they have no idea all the stuff you do, and even if you’re not good at some things, you’re an incredible human being.” He kinda just looked at me like I was stuck in the dark ages. So, “You know why I got this new job?” “Because it gives you more money.” “No, I mean, do you know why I got this new job when other people didn’t? I was up against like 20 other applicants. Why I got it?” He shakes his head no. “I got this job, because I walked in there and told those people I was worth it. Didn’t matter that I was one of the youngest applicants. Didn’t matter that I hadn’t done this job in over 5 years. Didn’t matter anything else. I walked in there, and I owned it. Because I knew I was worth it. Because I decided a long time ago, if I want something, I’m worth it. You know, when I was growing up, I got made fun of because I had glasses, because I was poor, because I lived on a farm, because I had an accent, because of whatever, but I realized one day, that I’m worth it. And no one else is ever going to tell me that, you can’t ever let someone else decide how much you’re worth. You have to know, then tell everybody else how it is.” <—- I think that’s some of the best advice that has ever come out of my mouth. It was a super proud mom moment. I hope it sticks. It’s true.

God says:

She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. – Proverbs 3:15

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows. – Luke 12:6-7 (During a time when pennies were like a day’s wages)

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved – Colossians 3:12a

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. – Psalm 139:13-14

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. – Ephesians 2:10

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God – Matthew 5:5-9

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. – Genesis 1:27

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. – 2 Corinthians 5:17

Know that the Lord, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. – Psalm 100:3

We are beautiful and wonderful to God. He made us. Every last bit of us, and although we are always striving to be better people in general and more Christ-like, we’re still worth it. Every day of the week! Every time! We’re always worth it! One of my favorite pinterest quotes is this:

I mean! C’mon! Think about yourself that way! I hope this helps. I hope it inspires. I hope you all know, I’m praying for you. For you to be the best you, but even if every day doesn’t feel like that, you’re still trying, being a human is hard. Take a tip from the Father, and give yourself some grace! ❤

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for your grace. Thank you for your overwhelming grace and mercy. May it pour out upon us. Into our souls. Deep down in the depths of our being, so much, as to overflow onto those around us. That others may see your grace through us. That we may show your grace because we know your grace. Thank you for your blessings Father. Thank you for the lives that we live. Thank you that you are the great Father that knit us together in our mother’s wombs. That you remind us of how special and precious we are. That you, who created everything, decided the world needed one of us too. Thank you for giving us the chance to honor you with our lives. Thank you that your grace and mercy knows no bounds, and that you don’t leave us where we are but you are always helping us fine tune ourselves to be more like you. Thank you that we’re worth it. Every time, all the time. IN JESUS’ NAME!! AMEN!!!

Guest Entry 

This week, I’m happy to have a guest entry. I’d like to introduce Jeff Struwe. We go to the same church, and we work at the same place. Jeff and I connected a few weeks ago after Sunday Service, and I gave him my card to hop online and check out my blog. He was so interested and excited about it, that I offered to have him do a guest entry for me. And, he did not disappoint! Jeff is working with a local group to compile a book, that I must admit, I cannot wait to read! I hope you all enjoy Jeff’s share as much as I did. ❤ Thanks Jeff!

The Wide Gate

Walking In Faith is one of those blogs that once I read the first one I look forward to the next. Stephanie Hale has created this blog who gives us life lessons while walking in faith.  I am extremely privileged to be allowed to participate in this week’s Walking In Faith.

My personal testimony is perfect for Christ’s teaching in Matthew 7. And making a bold prediction, many born again Christians will admittedly agree.

Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.   Matthew 7: 13-14

When I was 14 years-old a friend’s father paid for a one week Baptist bible camp in North Dakota. This was in lieu of payment for doing chores on their family farm. I concurred. What followed was my biggest life changing moment. On the next to last day of camp, I gave my life to Jesus. However, what followed for 39 years was anything but living a life of Christ. Our actions are our responsibility. I had no idea how to follow up once I gave my life to Jesus; regular bible study (daily), attending a bible based church, and the camaraderie with other born again Christians. You see, for the 39 years I did virtually what I wished. Nothing bad, but certainly not a Christian lifestyle. I basically put Jesus on a back burner and helped raise a family until after 20 years of marriage ended in divorce.

But never once did I feel miserable. A second relationship didn’t fare well either. But this time I knew things had to change. Not only was this last relationship a failure, but after working for 20 years with the Post Office – a job I really loved – work began to get on my nerves.

The Narrow Gate

I left everything behind and struck out for a place I referred to as home (South Dakota). I guess I was like Jonah. Trying to hide from God. We all know how that turned out and it was no different than my situation.

You see, I was walking on that wide path and realized destruction wasn’t far away. I needed to do something, so . . . I literally called out to Jesus and reminded Him that 39 years ago I gave Him my life. Imagine, reminding Jesus of my situation. After being hired by my current employer, the Holy Spirit spoke to me about finding a church. (#Godshowedup) I attended a few in the surrounding area of Brookings, but after dating a co-worker for a month or so, she brought me to Holy Life Tabernacle in Brookings. BINGO. Twelve years later, my most important day of the week is Sunday. Fellowship at the Tabernacle. And that co-worker?  We have been married 11+ years.

I have to be perfectly clear though. Even knowing that I am on that narrow path leading to the greatest prize, Heaven, I must watch my step. And I know that many, many others are in the same situation I am. I would like to offer 2 Christian songs about my Walk In Faith. The first is the song, “I Am A Child of God.” The lyric is: “I’m no longer a slave to fear, I am a child of God.” You see, fear is the opposite of faith, and to walk in faith we are applying the teachings of Jesus and living with the Holy Spirit within us. The other is a song by Building 429. The title is “Where I Belong” and the lyric is, “All I know is I’m not here yet, This is not where I belong, Take this world and give me Jesus, This is not where I belong . . . “

Dwell on these lyrics. John 14:6 says, Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”  Walking in fear is giving in to the devil and walking in faith is following Jesus. And Building 429 tells us that as followers of Christ, this world that we live on is temporary and living with Jesus is eternity. To all my brothers and sisters in Christ, walk on that narrow path that Jesus describes to us in Matthew 7. Walk in Faith and you will be rewarded the grand prize.

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, thank you that you have faith in us. Thank you that you do not leave us where we are. That you save us from us! Thank you that you have made a way for us to get to you. That we are reminded that You want us all to be saved. Whether we sin terribly, or whether we’re just not quite walking as straight of a path as we should. You’ve forgiven it all, you’ve removed our sin from us as far as the East is from the West. That we may always remember that you wash us white as snow, as the pure, freshly fallen crystal snow, that’s so pure. Our sin is removed by your blood, that you’ve paid the ultimate price and that we may honor our covenant with you by living in a way that you would want for us. That we may honor your name with all that we are, that we continue to straighten our feet and keep our eyes on the prize – our eternal life with you. That no matter where we’re at, we can re-adjust our steps and fall in line with your will for us. That you are the good, good Father, and that you only want good things for us. Thank you Father for all that you are, and all that you would have us be. IN JESUS’ NAME!! AMEN!!

It starts…

If you’ve been reading here for a while, you might know some of this, but for those of you who haven’t here’s a short recap. Years ago, I worked for a different company, and was brought from the shop floor into a desk job (which never happens there), and I got the incredible opportunity to work with a woman who would become one of my best friends. She was also my mentor, she had 30 years in the industry, and I was going to school online at night, and then would come in during the day, and we would discuss various aspects of business, and she would teach me everything she knew about the work that we did. Sadly, this company that I worked for, didn’t have the best culture, so I finally decided that this is not where I wanted to spend my career. I moved into another position at a different company, but in a short time, found out that this one wasn’t going to work either. I ended up starting back at the bottom, at another local company, but this one had a GREAT culture, and I loved the company. I also just felt like I needed some time to sort my life out, since leaving the second company had been a rough and eye-opening experience. While I thought I was sorting things out, I thought part of my solution was taking me far away from here, but #Godshowedup 3 days before we were going to start making real moves to start looking into other places to live, and gave me an incredible dream job opportunity at the same company where I was starting over from the ground up. You can read more about this here: Plans, Plans, Plans.

So, I’ve been in this crazy, incredible job for the past four years. And, it’s been great, I’ve loved it! I’ve been so busy enjoying my job, I never really had a chance to stop and look around me. My one coworker states that this job moves so quickly it’s like trying to catch a freight train on foot. It’s fast-paced, high stress, and you’re so busy all the time, you hardly have a moment to catch your breath. But, I’ve enjoyed it! I always would joke with people, that I forget that they pay me to do this sometimes, then someone walks in and hands me a paycheck, and I’m like, “Oh yeah, this is how I pay my bills!” I mean, that’s the goal, right? But, you know, there was always something that I had in the back of my mind. I used to have a desk, and wear professional clothes, and I have a degree, and…..But, oh well. I knew God was doing stuff. And, I just had to trust that he had the big picture sorted out. I had no idea what that looked like. Well, then a couple months ago, right before my Christmas miracle, someone within the company asked me to apply for a job coming open. And, I thought, here it is! This is more along my career path, here we go! So, I applied, and got through 2nd interview…. and they picked the other candidate. Oh, I was frustrated, but I also reminded myself that God knows what he’s doing, and that must not have been what he was doing, but it did make me start thinking about other opportunities again. And, low and behold, within the last 30 days, another position opened up. And, this one, again, was along my career path, was what I was working on achieving with my mentor. Here we go! So, again, I applied, made it through 2nd interview….and I GOT IT!!! But, if the other person had specifically asked me to apply for the one a couple months ago, I wouldn’t have taken the time to realize I was ready for something else.<— See how God used that?

#Godshowedup

And, this job, is WAY better, way more prestigious, and it solves all my money issues, which has been a general theme for a few of my posts. Plus, I feel like it’s a sort of reward, definitely a blessing. I started tithing when money was tight, now, I’m going to really start making some waves! I stayed true, thanked God for his mercy and grace, and knew that he had the bigger plan sorted out. When I was asked, in the second interview, what kinds of things do I do for self improvement outside of work, I mentioned my blog and told them it was about my faith. I mean, Holy Ghost! I felt like that was a big step out in faith moment – here I am with two directors and my new boss, and I’m like, “well, I’ve picked up sewing and made some neat things. And, I’ve started a blog about my faith, that’s been interesting and rewarding, and I’ve started a ladies bible study, and I’m working on helping people prepare with missions, and I help out with my son’s ……” etc. Three of the four things I listed first though, were about my building my faith and relationship with our Lord and Savior. And, man, did God show up?!?!

Also, funny side note. On the day that I’m waiting for an answer (because I was supposed to know whether or not I got the job a few days ago, but some stuff happened that delayed things.) I was having a terrible day. I was doing my job by myself, work was crazy because of some things happening from all this wild weather, I had several tasks to complete in a short amount of time…. I mean, it was all just kind of a hot mess, and so was I. But, I got everything done, and I’m clocking out for the day (which on this day is noon). So, I go to get some lunch for my family and myself and even that’s a hot mess. I mean, I just cannot win. Everything is just not happening today. But, I’m trying for all I’m worth to stay cool. I had just recently had a really terrible day, and God helped me through it, so SAME GOD today as the other day. I’ll be alright. I get home with the food, and they get MY order wrong. My husband and my son, theirs is fine, but mine, all sorts of messed up, and I REALLY wanted my food, they could’ve cared less. UGH! But, I was also reminded of a blog I had read a while back, where the girl had discussed Elijah yelling at God and complaining how everything was wrong and messed up (1 Kings 19:5). And, God was like, here’s some food… and why don’t you take a nap? And, we should all remember to never underestimate the power of food and a nap. So, that’s exactly what I did. I ate my messed up order, and I took a nap. And, when I woke up, I had just missed a call from my soon-to-be new boss. So, I shook off the sleep, and called him back. And, he offered me the job. #Godshowedup Nothing about my day seemed nearly as bad when I woke up, even before I called him back to find out things were about to change forever 🙂

So although this story is just a few short paragraphs, from beginning to now, is over 7 years of my life. 7 years of trusting that God knows what’s up, and I’m just trusting him to show me what I’m doing. And, this is just the work part, the other parts of my blog discuss the personal battles that have happened in between those 7 years. The constant refining and removing and shifting that God has been working at to help get me where I am. All those things are working together to help me get to where I’m going. And, although I have no idea what the future has for me, I’m only 30. I mean, if this is where I’m at now, I know that God has got some serious stuff going on and big plans for my life. I know, that if I just continue to trust him, and let him make my path straight, it’s all going to work out. There were plenty of times where I couldn’t see the forest through the trees, but now, hind-sight is 20/20.

“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank You for your blessings. Thank you for always having things figured out for us. Thank you for your faith in us, and our faith in you. That we always be drawn closer to you. That we may follow in the footsteps you make for us. That we may have the great peace that surpasses all understanding because our thoughts are not your thoughts and you have great thoughts about us that we cannot comprehend. That the blessings you wish to pour out upon us are more than enough, greater than anything we could ever imagine. That you are the great and mighty Father who loves his children dearly and wishes only the best for us. That you are the Beginning and the End, and that you are there before we get there. That we can walk in faith because you know where we’re going, like a parent guiding a child, holding our hands through the turmoil, and picking us up and carrying us through when we need it. That you are the great and mighty God who ensures our future and leads us in the way to it. Thank you God for all that you are, and all that you are making us to be. IN JESUS’ NAME!!! AMEN!!

Taking your own advice

So, I’ve been doing this blog for a while now, and have found it so incredible, how many times, I’ve needed to read my own blog. Like, while my kid was having his outbreak, and I was stressing out, my mom said, “Go read your blog.” (which was this post.) Or, there have been a few times where I just read it, and I pull a little piece of insight that I didn’t have before. It’s been quite the incredible little item of retrospection. And, we all need to do that sometimes don’t we? Take a moment to listen to ourselves, and maybe even let the Holy Spirit help you pick up on some additional insight that you didn’t realize you needed or already had.

So, I said a couple weeks ago, I was going to be sharing about some major life events that would never leave me the same. My biggest and most recent one, was “The Year of Great Loss.” Sometimes when my husband and I go through major life events or stories that we’ll never forget, we give them nicknames. This is a snapshot of what happened to us in 2017. I don’t feel like dragging the story out because a lot of it was Satan, but after I handed it over to God, he’s used it all for good.

The Year of Great Loss

December 2016: my friend is falsely jailed for a crime they didn’t commit

January 2017: My landlord sold our house out from under us. And, the person he sold it to, is a Scrooge.

February (All in 2017): my friend’s wife moves in because he’s in jail until the trial and she needs help; my husband’s grandpa passed

March: friend gets let out on bail, but isn’t allowed to move in with us, wife has to move out

April: life long friend is hospitalized for alcoholism, we inherit the dog, who is very sick (eye infection, skin infection, and some cancer)

May: friend from alcoholism passes, another friend moves in because he moved from far away & needs help (and is suffering from health problems), we continue to try to help the dog-they won’t operate on the cancer until the other problems clear-up

June: finally get the dog “ok” for surgery

July: full of family birthdays (good stress <3)

August: serious fighting with some of our live-in friends and family members, also was notified that our house is going to get demolished – we have 45 days to move out, trial for my friend begins, the wife that lived with us – her dad passes

September: my uncle’s house burned down, he’s in the ICU with his whole family, we’re packing and moving into another house, my friend is found guilty for a crime he didn’t commit

October: we find out the house we just moved into is owned by a crazy person who now tries to triple the rent, my uncle is working on getting out of ICU – everyone else has been released, we find a new place (we have just moved an entire house worth of stuff twice, in less than 30 days), both roommates move out when we do

November: my uncle is finally released from ICU, and my dad passes away from a massive heart attack

I don’t remember much after that.

I literally got to a point during all this, where if I wasn’t keeping you in the loop, I just didn’t even bother trying to explain what was happening. I had a few people tell me that I reminded them of Job. And, the best part of that, is that Job got everything back twice-over. Now, I will say, some of that you really can’t get back – losing loved ones, but in the aftermath of losing loved ones, you really change your perspective on life. That was probably one of the bigger benefits of all this. Also, when I’m looking back on it, I realized, that just a little before EVERYTHING started, I really started praying. Like really praying. Down on my hands and knees, worshiping God for his greatness, being thankful for everything, and praying for others and myself, for more than 3 minutes, sometimes I would lose track of time I was praying so long. And, as Ephesians 6:12 says: “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” (ESV)

Somewhere around August, between fighting with friends, and getting told that we needed to move out, Satan showed his hand. I had this epiphany moment, where I realized that there was no way that all of this was coincidence. That Satan didn’t like what I was up to, and where I was going in my life, and began to take me down a notch (or five :P). Which only caused me to double-down for a while there. And, as you can see between August and November – it only climaxed into a whirlwind of madness, because Satan and I both knew who we were dealing with. And, then I believe that God stepped in, and took my dad home, and said, “Enough”. Because everything stopped after that. And, it was exactly what our entire family needed to begin healing, to put things in perspective, to draw us closer to Him. I couldn’t have made it through that year without God.

He’s used a lot of those things for good.

The dog needed someone who could care for her, so she ended up with us, and we got her back to being all better, cancer-free and able to live out a few more years. The house we lived in originally, wasn’t the best, and with the weather we’ve had this year, we would probably be suffering for it. My husband and I finally moved into a house that doesn’t allow roommates, which had been a big part of our lives for almost 15 years. We always lived in places that had an “extra” room, and it always seemed to be filled with someone in need. But, God finally closed that chapter of our lives, which has allowed the two of us to grow closer again. My friend who is still falsely imprisoned right now, has started a ministry within the prison, and using this to glorify God. His wife stays strong in the Faith, and helps keep people updated out here, and also shares his ministry information with us – we continue to fight the charges – more info another time here. My uncle’s house burned down, and he was released just in time to be here with us when my dad passed. He’s also been on a journey since then of adjustment and a self-discovery of sorts. And, although it was and is hard, my dad passing has allowed much of my family to grow closer to each other, and to God. We stepped into new roles, we’ve taken on different responsibilities, and we’ve grown as people and as followers in Christ, which is exactly the kind of legacy my dad would want. So, although, 2017 was a Year of Great Loss, it’s been gain since. Just as God promises. Satan tried to take me down, to steal, kill, and destroy. But, when I leaned on God, he lifted me up with his mighty right hand. (Isaiah 41:10) And, currently, I feel like I’m winning life. (Luke 21:19) Which is a far cry from just 2 years ago.

Now, I hope you all know that I didn’t share this story to gain pity, but to encourage you. Although our circumstances are different, God will help you win. It’s a promise. He is the Victor. And he wants us to have the Victory. No matter how big your problems seem, God’s handled them all before, you just need to let him. Also, always remember who you’re fighting. You’re not fighting a diagnosis, or a coworker, or a family member, or a circumstance, you’re fighting Satan. But, we’re on the winning team, we just have to remember that.

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, you are amazing. You are our Victor. You are our strength, encouragement, and comforter. You are everything we could ever need. May your blessings pour out upon us. May your face shine upon us, and may we find ourselves always in your arms. Help us to grow our Faith, that we may recognize Satan’s attacks for what they are, and let you handle them. That you use everything in our lives for your good. That you equip us for these battles, that you help us keep our hearts and eyes focused on you. That you give us your supernatural strength and wisdom to win at life. That we may be servants that make you proud. That we can share our testimonies with those around us, to encourage them and give them strength and understanding to win their battles. May we do this all for your glory and honor. In JESUS’ NAME. AMEN!!

Life Happens

Amen. Life happens. I’m preaching to the choir, right? Life happens to all of us, we’re living it. Some days are better than others, some days are so bombarded with stuff, it almost seems unimaginable that we’re still here. But, in these moments, I’m reminded of how we are supposed to be handling these things. We’re supposed to be turning them over to God, and letting him handle it. Asking him to lift us up with his righteous right hand. To not be dismayed or discouraged. He is our God, and he will prevail. He is the victor. And, through Him, so are we.

I just went through a rough season, my entire month of February was a wreck. Like, freight train. First, my son got the flu, then my husband, then myself. Only, my son got a fever and some gut rot deal, my husband had a fever for 5 days and pretty much slept the whole time. And, I got some sort of stomach flu deal, that made it impossible for me to keep anything inside me. Day 3 of my flu, I had become so dehydrated, that I required medical attention. I woke up as soon as the clinic opened and told them that I needed to get in ASAP. They could see me within the hour. Amazing. I opened up my front door, blizzard. I seriously was so delirious from my illness that I considered calling an ambulance. But, I knew that if I could just get there, I would be ok. So, I get the last of my strength, and I get in the car to go to the clinic. I’m practically delusional by this point, my mouth and throat are dry, every time I take a drink my lips and throat instantly need more fluids and are dry again. The doctor pretty much just looked at me and said, “We need to get some fluids in you.” I had lost 10 pounds, at least, maybe more. I’m not someone who can afford to lose 10 pounds. I didn’t even recognize myself in the mirror. As they took me back to a room and got me situated, my messenger app buzzed. It’s the women’s feed from church. We use it as a way to share encouraging words, or request prayers, quick notes, etc. The Pastor shared her morning devo: “Come to me for rest and refreshment. This journey has been too much for you, and you are bone-weary. Do not be ashamed of your exhaustion. Instead, see it as an opportunity for Me to take charge of your life.” – (which is an excerpt from Shannon Stoddard on beliefnet) But, this word came to me, right as they are plugging IVs into my arm, and I just shed a tear. Yes, Lord. You are my rest and refreshment. I ended up needing two bags worth of fluids to get me back to some sort of human. And, I rested while they pumped me full of fluids, but I knew I was going to be fine with that word. Amen. Then, we all got to have some sort of break for about a week, where we were kind of getting back to normal. Then, my son had a cold sore outbreak.

Cold sores. No big deal. Not for my kid. My kid doesn’t get like the little one on his lip. He gets blisters all inside his cheeks, on his tongue, they spread onto his lips. He can’t eat, he can’t hardly talk, can’t go to school. It’s a big deal. He takes medication but it doesn’t seem to do much, yet. Maybe we’ll try some different medicine next time. Either way. This outbreak was rough, he ended up getting a particularly nasty UTI as well, that could only hopefully be remedied with one medicine, and if this didn’t work, he’d have to check in to the hospital. One super sick little kid, and two really stressed out parents. It lasts for about 2 weeks. I mean. We just can’t win. He just starts clearing up, we get the call that a friend of my husband and I’s, of 15 years – at least, has passed away.

Sometimes, when it’s too much to stand, kneel. I have prayed so much this month. Prayed for healing. Prayed for direction. Prayed for strength. Prayed for everything. And, today, I needed all those prayers. Today, was a loooong day. A funeral and reception/wake, errand for a friend – which went horribly awry, picking up my kid, stuff for Cub Scouts, eye dr, picking up my nephew, stressful but good work phone call, taking my son to piano, finding out the snowblower is a different kind of broken with a serious blizzard en route, and finally picking up my car from the shop…

Now, my car has had me town-bound for almost 2 years. I had taken it to 3 different shops and dumped a ridiculous amount of money into it, and every time I got it back, it still wasn’t fixed. I was seriously discouraged. But this last year, during my Christmas miracle, the group had wanted to look into getting my car fixed and requested I take it to a specific shop they work with. And this guy, is amazing. I’m someone who knows a thing or two about cars, and loathe when mechanics talk to me like all I know about cars – is that I have a purple one. Please. This guy went for a drive with me, and finally figured out what was going on with my car. Now, although the group couldn’t spring to help me at the time, but I now had a quote to go with my problem, finally. So, when tax time rolled around. My car went to the shop. And, today, I got my car back. I had never realized how much I had been stressing about my car, FOR 2 YEARS, until I was able to touch my brake pedal doing 55 today, and not being afraid that my car was going to rip itself apart. I cried. The relief of not being afraid of my own car, was so overwhelming. I thanked God. And, I realized all the other wonderful things that happened to me this month, in spite of everything else.

Different me

2 years ago, if I had a day like this, I would’ve called my mom, or another good friend of mine, and just railed. I can’t believe this, why won’t this day just stop, on and on…. But, today, when I felt that moment. When I felt that full boar, ROAR! What is going on!?!!? And, wanted to blow it up all over someone’s ear drum, I didn’t. I remembered the moment of rest and refreshment, of God giving me the strength. In the midst of my madness, somewhere between Cub Scouts and my nephew, I was just losing it, and all of the sudden, instead of picking up the phone and proceeding to regurgitate my issues all over someone else’s day. I just plugged in my Christian tunes. Jammed out to some DC Talk, Newsboys, and David Crowder. And, said, “God, you’ve got this. Because I don’t.” And I imagined the “story” where Satan comes knocking, and you see him through the peephole, and go, “God, it’s for you!” and walk away. I couldn’t possibly handle my day today, but God did. I didn’t have the strength to deal with everything that happened today, but God saw me through. I also decided to start thinking about all the great stuff that happened this month. And, I hadn’t even picked up my car yet….

The Good things, the God things:

I shared at church on Wednesday night, my testimony, and many, instead of giving me judgy looks and deciding they didn’t really want to be encouraging me anymore, instead loved me more. “Powerful testimony.” “You’ve really overcome a lot.” “I’m so glad you’re here.” And, I got to pray for a lot of people, who after hearing my testimony, wanted me to pray for them. It was so rewarding, and comforting, and encouraging, and praying for them – felt so good. Just this incredible, otherworldly good. Deep down in my soul – good.

I also got to be a guest blogger this month! Amen! How encouraging! Feel free to check out her site, and my guest blog.

My son and I made a memory this month during his sickness, that we will never forget (but is too embarrassing to share openly here).

I got to reach out to friends during our great loss that we haven’t seen in years, and be people that they could depend on in their time of need.

I got to see an old friend for coffee, and a new one. 😀

I started making some new career moves, that might pay off.

I had a a couple big wins at work. I mean, God is good.

My son did finally get better, and so did I, and so did my husband.

And, then, I finally got my car fixed. God had it all, the whole time. Continued to sprinkle blessings in with the madness. Reminding me that He was here, and wants good things for me. And rewards those who follow him. And, we need to remember that. He wants good things for us, but we have to trust that he does.

“Encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.” 1 Thessalonians 2:12

“Strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith. “We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God,” they said.” Acts 14:22

“But godliness with contentment is great gain.” 1 Timothy 6:6

“Stand firm, and you will win life.” Luke 21:19

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, I pray right now, that you lift this person up with your righteous right hand. That you give them the strength and endurance to win life. To remember that you are the victor. The Alpha and Omega. You’ve got it all under control. And, although, we can’t always see the end, you’re already there and waiting. You know the plans you have for us, and we need only to trust you. To give you thanks for all the great things you do, and appreciate all the time we do have here, with our loved ones, friends, and family. That, you, our Great Big God, the Great I AM, can get us through any of our days. That we need only to turn to you. To ask you to take it from us, for your yoke is light, and the world’s is heavy. We don’t have to do everything on our own, because we are not alone. I pray that the person reading this starts to have eyes that see the good in every day and every person. That you have created them all, and they are all perfect in your sight. That we may open our hearts with compassion for all your good works. That we receive your blessings, and we shut the door on Satan when it’s not for us. I pray a shield of protection against the world’s fiery darts, and that you shut the mouth of the roaring lion. I thank you Father for all that you do, for your peace, and your comfort, and for your everlasting life, and your strength. That all these things we may receive. In Jesus Name. AMEN!!

Take it to the Lord in Prayer

I’m building off of last week’s here a little bit. It’s just really been on my heart and I cannot emphasize enough how important this life line is. Please believe, that’s exactly what it is. No ands, ifs, or buts about it.

Let me share a little story here. A couple months ago was the one year anniversary of my dad passing away. And a few people had let me in on a little secret when it first happened. The first year, is a year of “firsts”. First Christmas without them, first Thanksgiving, first birthday. And please believe, they all suck. They all absolutely suck. We smiled, we gritted our teeth and beared it, but we have quite a few small children between us. So, you kinda have to. You can’t call off Christmas because everyone just can’t handle the holiday or thought of this person not being there for it, a 4 year old does not get that. But, the one that took me a little by surprise, was the anniversary of his death…. I’m not sure why I expected that day to not be as terrifying as it was going to be in my mind, that I was blowing it out of proportion, but I was not. There is something to be said about that day. You think about it, all the way up to the moment that you heard the news or the time they told you it did happen, and then you just replay all of it in your head for the rest of the day. And, it’s awful. And, I’m really sorry if you’ve lost someone recently and this is stirring all your stuff up, but I’m just being honest. It’s just brutal. And, I think, moving forward from that moment, the only part that helps is that you get to reassure yourself that you’ve already survived the “first” one without them, so you can handle more. But, anyway, that wasn’t supposed to be the focus here. Got a little off topic, but still important to the rest of the story.

So here we are. The anniversary of my dad’s death, and I’m a wreck. I’m at work, and I’m hiding, and I’m randomly crying, and I’m trying to act like everything’s fine, which it SOOO isn’t. And, I’ve packed my whole day with stuff. I’m going to get off work, then I have to run over here, and do this thing, and over there and do that thing, and, and, and… and my sister asks if I’m going out to my mom’s tonight, and I start making all these excuses, my schedule is full! (Obviously, I’ve done this on purpose). And, so I text my mom to tell her, I’m really sorry, I’m just so busy, and she, in all of her wisdom and awesomeness, says exactly what I needed to hear. “It’s ok, I’m here if you need me. Don’t worry about it.” At which point, I can no longer pretend that everything’s ok. I become hysterical, and I promptly leave work. I come home to my unsuspecting husband, who has no idea that I’m going through all of this. And, proceed to sob and ugly cry all over him. Which, he just holds me, and lets me. And, then, I pull it together and say I’m going to see my mom. And, I go out to my mom’s, and explain everything, and then, we do a few projects (guess where I learned that coping mechanism from…. ;)) And, I’m kinda better, and now I have to go pick up the kids. So, we hug and I feel much better, and I head back into town, and back to that crazy schedule I had laid out. And, one of the things on my list, is church tonight. The kids have been working on Operation Christmas Child (which I did with my dad for close to 20 years), so I feel obligated to go, even though after that huge emotional release, I’m just drained. But, God knew, that I needed to go to church that night, so look at all this stuff come together…. I am dragging my feet to go to church, but we’re doing it, for my kid, here we are. And the message that night was exactly what I needed to hear. And, it changed my life. And, I hope it changes yours too. Because – it changed the way I think. *which is another concept I’ve been trying to share with you here.

*Insert your name here* has the victory

Say it with me. You have the victory. Why? Because God has the victory. That was the message. Let’s unpack a little.

You are “X” years old. You have lived this one life. You have “X” years of experience. You have experienced “X” things. Right? Right.

God is ???? however old. He has watched billions of lives. He has helped billions of people, trillions. He has experienced ALL things. YOUR PROBLEMS ARE NOT NEW TO GOD. God has done this all before. God has a perfect track record. God always wins. God already won. God knows exactly what you’re going through. God has comforted grief before. God has comforted rape before. God has comforted abuse before. God has forgiven murderers. God has solved people’s finances. God has solved every single problem there has ever been. God has helped every single situation of every single person that has ever come asking. God has healed every thing before. Stop acting like God can’t handle your problems!! I’m sorry that this might sound crass, but you are not special. You did not suddenly come up with the very first problem that God was like, “Whelp, you got me there, good luck, let me know how that turns out.”

And, as soon as you grasp that, like really grasp that. Chew on it. Mix it. Get it from your head to your heart – God will show up. You have got to stop acting like we have this itty-bitty God.

Isaiah 40:12
Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
    or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
    or weighed the mountains on the scales
    and the hills in a balance? (NIV)

That’s A GREAT BIG GOD! He holds all the oceans, waters, seas, rivers in the hollow (cup) of his hand…. That’s a GREAT BIG GOD! And, he’s the God that lives inside you. He has the victory

1 John 5:4
⁴ for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith

We have the victory. God has the victory. We, team God, have the victory. Over everything. Over all our problems. Let him. Let him fix it. Let him heal it. Stop trying to do it on your own. Stop acting like you’re so broken, God can’t fix you. He CAN! and He WILL! and HE DOES!! Same God. Same God who always was, is, and will be. THE GREAT I AM!! SAME GOD. Problems change, people change, things change, GOD DOES NOT CHANGE. Same God, who does it for everyone else, will do it for you. Let him. And, that change, starts with prayer. Talk to him. Tell him about it. Ask him to fix it.

Romans 12:12
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, I’m bringing this person to you today. Because, you are our Great Big God. There’s nothing you can’t handle or fix or forgive. I’m bringing them to you, that they might start understanding this incredible relationship with you. That they might know that you are their God. Their own personal God. Who wants to come into their life and be their Savior. To fix their problems, to let them know they are not alone, ever. I’m praying that you may soften their heart to you. That you may reach inside them and touch them, and take all the ugliness they’re hiding out. That you will make them a new creation in you, Father. That they may truly understand, from their head to their heart, that you’ve got all of this. That there is nothing “too big” for you, Father. That you’ve done this all before. That you are the Great I AM. That you have the grace, and the mercy, and the healing, and the understanding, and the love to cover and cleanse and handle everything we could ever want or need. You know their hearts, Father. You know every need, every hope, every thought they have, and you are everything they need. Please, instill this peace and understanding in their hearts, that they may take it all to you and know that they, and everything that they have and are, are yours Father. IN JESUS NAME, WE PRAY, AMEN!! ❤