I have found myself wandering in the wilderness, as of late. And, one of the things I am constantly hearing, and being reminded of, through this season, is to remain. To be diligent. To just keep showing up. That the breakthrough is in the consistency.

I have never heard the story of Abraham so many times in my life, in such a short period of time, as of late. The subtle nuances of Abraham’s story, that he believed. That he was faithful. The constant note that it was years, YEARS, from the time the Word was spoken to him, to the time it came to fruition. And yet, he remained. That at one critical part of his story, ends with him being 80 something years old, and suddenly the next verse – it’s 13 years later.

And, of course, we can only infer what happened during that time, but there is a theory – that he just remained. He just stayed the course. He just kept believing in God, and knew that God wasn’t done with him yet.

I know that just a few short years ago, literally just before the pandemic started, our local ladies Bible Study, started a book of Waiting. And we went through several stories throughout the Bible, of women, who were waiting. And all the different levels of waiting. Those who waited well, and those who weren’t as good at waiting. All the waiting….

Sadly, I’m not quite sure what I’m waiting for. I am in this mysterious period of limbo it seems. I do know that for the last two years, I have had a hard time with goals. And, today we also received a message of having a vision, to dream big. And, it brought me right back to the fact, that I’m really not sure what I’m dreaming for. I feel a crux of this life I have worked so hard to achieve, to put together, of all this work and effort to have this job, that I do have…. and yet, my heart is with Jesus. I want to do missions. I want to do this blog. I want to continue to outreach to my community and ladies’ Bible study. My husband keeps telling me to write a book… I feel like this job is supposed to help enable me to do that somehow, but I just don’t know how all these pieces fit.

I do know, that God has given me this feeling and this longing for a reason. That these are the desires of my heart. I know that He knows how this all fits together. And, I just need to trust in Him to get me there. But, oh the pain of waiting, the angst of not knowing. This season of digging deeper. Of going back to the basics. Of truly understanding who I am, to know how I’m supposed to be reaching others… and yet, continuing to do what I’m supposed to do. Showing up. Being there, every day. Living and breathing His Word, that I may know Him better. That others may see His light through me.

I am suddenly reminded of the Israelites wandering the desert for 40 years. Of Jesus, in the wilderness for 40 days. Of Elijah in Cherith for approximately 2-3 years (we’re not exactly sure). Of Abraham. Of Anna (who waited her whole life to see the Messiah & gets a whopping 3 verses in the Bible). Of Hannah (who had Samuel). Of Joseph (and his brothers)… and the soft whisper that God is faithful. That in the midst of all these stories, no one knew how their lives were turning out. No one knew what the next chapter looked like. But, they did trust God, and they remained. As boring, and inglorious as that can be sometimes. They waited. They persevered. That sometimes, we’re on fire for Jesus, and sometimes it’s the still soft whisper. That not everything is going to be fun and exciting, and we don’t know where we’re headed, and the vision is not simple and plain, but we show up. We trust God. He is the author and finisher of our faith. And, as all these stories remind us, He is faithful.

Let’s Pray

Dear Heavenly Father, Great is thy Faithfulness. Blessed be Your Name, O God. Thank you for the fruits of the Spirit. Thank you for knowing what we need. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for growing us, and pruning us. Thank you for watching over us and guiding us Father God. That your word never returns void. That you sustain us, no matter where we are, deep in the trenches or out in the wilderness. That you are blessing us. That you know the plans you have for us, that you prosper us and are working things together for the good of those who believe. Thank you for your living water, that pours into us, that may overflow and pour into others Father God. Blessed be your name. That you are enriching us, each and every day. IN JESUS’ NAME!! AMEN!!